So now it is Tuesday. And it is almost the middle of the night again. I need to sleep. I want to sleep. My mind is just going and going and going.
I have been daydreaming about a bender with my friend IRL Becky. I need a good nite of being sloppy. We were hoping to do it last weekend, but then my kidney boulder got in the way. Go figure. Had to go to the ER Friday am because I thought I was dying. Picture this: me in the ER waiting room on all fours puking because I was in so much pain that I was sure that I was dying. I have given birth F.I.V.E. times and I thought that a 3-4mm (or is it cm) kidney stone was going to kill me. Anyhow, nice visual imagine huh? I was sure glad that I got to tell the kids it wasn't just cause I eat crap. The doctor said that it is more common in women with multiple pregnancies. And we are all pretty sure that I fall into that category now with the number of pregnancies at 7. Yeah, sometimes I just throw that number out there because of it's shock value! And it always strikes me as weird when I am in a medical situation and they seem shocked when I say it out loud. It is hard for me to comprehend that some people wouldn't be able to see the love. And then when they ask me if there is a chance that I could be pregnant again and I respond with 'well, there is always a chance' - boy-o-boy, you should see their faces. hee hee.
Oh and speaking of the faces on medical personnel, I almost jumped through the little glass window at the pedi's office today and gave the gal who works there a whole new look. Boy, I am klassy.
The little girl with the fixed hair and ugly smirk made me angry because she INSISTED that our co-pay was $25. Ok you dumb cow, I only brought in $20 (cash) cause I KNOW OUR CO-PAY IS $20. Not to mention that we have been in that office 11 times in the last three months and we didn't have to pay for the last four visits because we had a credit. And then when I go to the car (with five kids in tow) to get the card and bring it back in, she has the nerve to tell me that she is unable to update our account because that is done at check-in so I'll need to do it next time. I wanted to say 'look you lazy ding-dong, log into your screen and do it now so that I don't have to strangle you later.' But I didn't.
Gosh, it seems I must have a few things pent up tonight.
This morning I was at swim team watching the older four. I ran into another sports mom that I really enjoy. Although our kids are not in the same school, our paths have crossed a few times in the world of sports. She told me today that she reads my blog. I can only hope she will still speak to me after she reads this entry! :)
I got my feelings hurt a JC's softball game Monday night. You might remember that a few years ago I had the chance to sub on his team. It was a great great night for me. Well, I have never been asked to sub since, although, in all fairness, I was pregnant for nine of those months. Last night the team was short a girl. There I sat on the bleachers with our five kids. There was another Cupcakes and Blood female fan sitting on the other bleachers. The other lady was asked to be the sub. Now the reason that this hurt my feelings is because I wanted to be asked. Plus, she was quite a bit larger than me (not being ugly) and she couldn't run (at all) cause he had a hurt ankle. Boy, doesn't this just take us all back to school days and being the last to be picked - after the blind girl with no arms and no legs. I was telling JC last night that I just couldn't understand why they wouldn't even ask me. He said very clearly that it had nothing to do with me or my ability to play, but that he was sure they didn't ask me because of the baby. Well, that made me feel even worse.
You all know that I LOVE our kids. Really really waited my whole life for this family and love them so much it hurts. But geez Louise, I am still here too. It is okay for me to do a thing or two without them. And go figure, it might be good for them to actually see me getting to do something that I want to do that is fun. Oh well.
I guess that is more proof that I need to slip off into the night with Becky and walk into some dive where no one knows me a let it all melt away. Mmmmm...cold beer.
I let #1 get a facebook page today. Before you know it they will all have cell phones too. I told him the rule with the fb page was that he had to always keep me as his friend. ALWAYS. (I got that rule from a very very smart mom friend.) He was so proud of himself tonight sending flair to people and writing on walls. I probably should have doubled my pain medication tonight because I was getting a little stressed by the whole scene. This is what was going through my mind: 'don't be friends with that girl, she is loose', 'you just sent flair to my friends that has the word sucks on it, geez', 'why are you chatting with that person? I bet their parents don't even know they have a fb page'. He is growing. I have to accept it. I love some of the teenage things that #1 and #2 do, but it makes me want to hold on to them even tighter because the days are getting shorter and shorter.
SBW is really starting to get the hang of standing on his own. I've been thinking that it might be time to get him to start sleeping in his own bed. But then I get afraid that I'll miss him and change my mind. Plus, sometimes he wakes us up in the middle of the night because he is laughing and smiling. And I don't wanna miss that.
#4 is crazy swimmer these days. I can't believe that my sweet boy can swim 25 meters without stopping. Who told him that he could grow up? And I can't even think about him being in first grade. Gosh I really like that kid.
#3 is having a hard time today. Her good friend is moving to another country on Thursday. She is sad. This friend isn't someone that is our house everyday, but she is someone that #3 has had constant friendship with since Kindergarten. She was the very first sleepover. #3 likes life to be normal. Tonight she was crying and she told me that she was just sad about it. I feel sad about it too. Although I know that they will still be friends. It is totally gonna be weird. #3 is my steady eddie. She is a rock and she doesn't even know it.
#2 has had a non-stop summer so far. Movies, Schlitterbaun, Volente Beach, swim team, choir, sleepovers. This is one busy and happy kid and I am so glad that she has such a nice group of girlfriends. She makes me laugh a lot. I like being goofy with her.
Ok - gonna try to shower to relax. Maybe the sleep with come.
I have zillions of pictures of the last month. Maybe I'll post some soon.
For now, I'll leave you with this. I love raising our family in Austin.