Friday, July 10, 2009

Really? I won.

So tonight I was invited to a friend's house where she was having a gathering of moms from the neighborhood to eat, drink and visit. She invited between 15-20 moms who mostly have kids that go to our neighborhood school.

The party started at 7:30pm. Naturally, I got there around midnight. You know, JC got home from work around 8ish, then I had to feed the baby, find a movie, pop the popcorn, lay down sleeping bags for the guests, discipline the 6 year old, check facebook, read some email, nurse the baby....

Anyhow, midnight...

So when I got there, it was apparent that a handful of the neighborhood mom ladies had a bit to drink. Which you know, I am so okay with. I've been there and done that. So I just kinda chit chatted with a few ladies that I am friends with. And then in my attempt to not stand there obviously staring and listening, I started to pick up some of the bottles and help to get the kitchen cleaned up. (Go figure - our house is a mess.)

The drinks kept flowing. The ladies kept chatting. I walked around the kitchen island to clean up the bar and one of the ladies who I don't really know kinda touched my shoulder and said 'you have four kids?' - I didn't really respond, but one of the friends said 'no, five.'

Well from that point on, drunk neighbor lady and other drunk neighbor lady made a point to say very loudly "YOU WON". "OH MY GOD - FIVE KIDS. YOU ARE THE WINNER." When I would walk by, they'd laugh and put their hands on my shoulders in a drunk girl way and say "YOU WON". "YOU BEAT US. YOU WON." (Read the caps in your best drunk lady loud voice please.)


Now there is no question that people have lots of opinions about the size of our family. And many people feel like it is okay to share their opinion. We don't ever mind large family comments. As a matter of fact, our older kids have gotten into the habit of saying how much they'd love more siblings when a negative Nelly crosses our path.

You know, someone is always with the 'did you plan to have that many kids?' Uh, we didn't plan it. But I can almost guarantee that all of our kids are more loved and wanted than some of the planned kids you dumbass. (oops, I'll step down from my soap box now.)

So tonight was a first. I've never been told that I won. I was so confused. What does that mean? I wasn't participating in a contest. There was no race. We didn't have these children because we were trying to beat someone.

I love these kids. We love these kids. We wanted every single one of them. All I wanted in my life was to be someone's mom. That's it. I hasn't been a contest for me.

I am sure that drunk neighbor ladies didn't mean anything ugly by the comment. And I am sure that my awake-in-the-middle-of-the-night-brain is making WAY too much outta it.

But geez - I wasn't trying to win.

Although, I guess if I take a minute to stop and think about it. They were right. I did win.

My heart is so full.


Oh and on a side note, I would like to say that I realized tonight that I am growing up. Let me share with you how I know...

1. I wasn't the drunk loud lady.
2. I helped clean up the kitchen.
3. I drove a drunk friend home and had a fun time doing it. Paybacks are hell and I'll be puking in her front yard very soon!

I realize how lucky I am that I have a safe group of ladies to get my drink on with. I am so glad that I now know better than to venture outta the safe circle. It took me a long time to learn that lesson, but I am sure glad a did. (Thank God for my HB, AJ, Manvel Girls, Becky, Steph, Ruth, Sarah, and Liz. The friends that will kindly pull my feet outta my mouth and hold my hair back so that I can puke!) Oh, life is good.


christy said...

Kknow what KC? You ARE the winner. Not because you have more kids than the national average (which won't even replace their own two parents in the great scheme of things) but because you realize what it's about. It's not about reliving childhood through your kids. It's not about creating a name for yourself. It's not about doing what you think you're supposed to do. It's about LOVE. and what most selfish people don't understand is how love multiplies exponentially, it is not divided.

You are an awesome mom and an awesome friend and way to nice about those biotches.

Antoinette said...

You did win, my dear! What a beautiful family.

Heather and Stephen said...

I won, too! I have a ton of kids to love. And I am so thankful that my closest friends have enough to share. :) Love you. and ALL your kids!-- oh yeah...I'll be that lady at the "we're finally home" celebration I am sure. :)

Walli said...

Yo.. i have 11 boys.. soccer boys ?? perhaps i won ? lol.. too bad i wasnt invited to the party..

Anyway u r the winner always !!