Monday, August 10, 2009

The Dangerous Road

I am sitting here this morning trying so hard to think of something witty to write on my polka-dotted mommy blog. I hafta call it that because last week I heard someone on the news talking about moms with their polka-dotted mommy blogs that spend hours and hours bragging about their kids. I mean seriously, what gives us the right to inflict all of our scraped knees and first kiss stories on you anyhow???

Heh.

Today the house is really quite. Three kids are still sleeping. Seems to run in the family - sleeping late is so good. SBW is sitting in his chair eating more blueberries than should be allowed. And my #1, well he is at middle school camp. Yep, that's right. 7th grader camp.

I was pretty teary this morning. I asked him to be patient with me over the next few weeks and to just humor me if I want to comb his hair or tie his shoes. I thanked him for letting me comb his hair before we left.

They let us walk them to the door and say good bye. So we did. And then JC and SBW got to deal with me. My poor sweet JC is surely gonna have his hands full when the last one of our kids grows up.

I've got an appointment this morning to see the doctor. Seems that I am imploding. Shingles. Rashes. You name it, I think I've got it. She said when I saw her last Friday that the only real cure is to not be so stressed out.

ha ha. What a comodian.

I am guessing there is something to be said for dealing with your past. Seems like I've worked so hard to keep the closet door shut. And now there are a few skeleton toes trying to peek through the cracks and I am trying and trying to push them back in.

It is funny how you can live 25 or more years without dealing with something, and then seeing someone or talking to someone from that time of life can bring it all back. One innocent question of your well being can send you into a full blown tail spin. A simple comment about wishing for one's peace can make things start tumbling out. I wonder how I am gonna feel about all of this reunion-ing once this trip down the dangerous memory lane is over?

Well, at least I've got perspective...most of the time. I know that we have so much to be thankful for. I know that we are the fortunate ones.

It all could have turned out so much worse.

I am so so thankful.

2 comments:

christy said...

whew! i am relieved to not see polka dots. glad I didn't see that, i might have ranted for a week.

i am sorry to hear you're having stress related health problems. i share in your issues. kinda. mine's is stress-related TMJ. sometimes it's so bad i can't even open my mouth to put a piece of bread in it.

you and i have to remember that we have the best hubbies in all the world and the most fantastic kids ever! i mean...a 7th grade boy who will let his mom comb his hair LUVS his mama. and all that crap that gets dredged up every so often, it's old news.

-W said...

What's up KC? Too long a drive down memory lane?

I hear ya'. Glad you're back online.

much love
-wendy